Do I Consider Myself American?

I am tired of being asked if I consider myself American…
and when I say that I don’t…
people try to force America down my throat.

Honestly, when I hear “American” I think about raids, deportation, genocide, wars, guns, racism, segregation  etc etc

When I see the American flag I think about white supremacy for some reason.
But I feel like these are things I’m not allowed to say in public or when interviewed because the common response is…

“so why don’t you just leave?”

Well, Colombia is messed up…there’s a reason as to why we left.
There’s la guerilla
poverty is where my mother grew up
deaths all around
and of course we came to the united states for a better life. or at least a semi-decent one.

However,
Am I not allowed to be proud of where my family and I are from?
Am I not allowed to speak Spanish when I please? entonces para que carajos me ensenaron?
Am I not allowed to wave the Colombian flag around or wear Colombian jewelry?
Why is it that folks feel I can only be proud of the country of my birth while at a parade or festival…but not everyday

Some folks tell me…“well you are American because you were raised here and you advocate for equality..that’s the American thing to do”

No.

I wasn’t raised American. My mother raised me as a God-fearing-Colombian. 
What does it even MEAN to be “American”?
America imports cultures, music, food, religions even labor is imported. So to be American am I suppose to appreciate other music, food and religions?
Because if so… i already do that… i eat all kinds of food and listen to all kinds of music
but something tells me there’s more than that.

Apparently I am not American because I call politicians out on their bullshit.
So the American thing to do is sit around and let them do as they please?

I was raised listening to salsa, vallenatos, merengue, bachata
I was raised eating bunuelos, pan de bono, natilla, arepas, empanadas
and I honestly have more Spanish music on my Ipod than English

No.

Advocating for equality is not the American Thing To Do
Advocating for equality is the RIGHT thing to do..regardless of what country you are in.
Advocating for equality is something America does NOT do. Why do you think people protest? Why are people being racially profiled? Why are students being tracked while in school? Why are there homeless people? Why is there a wage inequality between men and women? Why is there a need for affirmative action? Why have we had dozens of white presidents and only now do we have an African American one? Why is there NAFTA? Why are almost all the Disney princesses white?

I respect everyone else’s ideas of America.
If you believe Democracy exists..that’s fine
If you believe the American Dream is real..that’s fine too
but respect me..and my beliefs.